A New Leaf?

11Jul09

The Monkey is currently with her Donor. Seriously. He’s actually had her for the last 3 hours. And, I don’t have to go get her at a set time tomorrow!

I’m liking the way things are going, but I’m certainly not counting on them staying that way. As much as I’d like to believe that he’s turned over a new leaf, I know better. I’ve known him for too long. But then, maybe I’m wrong for thinking that way. Maybe he really has turned over a new leaf and is trying to do better for her. I want him to be there for her, and I want her to grow up knowing him. I just know that he still has a lot of growing up to do his damn self. He’s flip-flopped like this before and it just seems too perfect of a balance too soon.

Am I wrong for thinking that this will probably only last two or three weeks and not even trying to trust that he wants to be a better person???

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4 Responses to “A New Leaf?”

  1. 1 Nicole

    Sometimes it’s hard to believe that things will ever be different than they’ve always been.
    As much hope and optimism we have can’t outweigh the doubts and broken and unfulfilled promises from the past.

    We can want to believe in change as much as we want but it’s impossible until we actually see it.

    I think it’s just what happens at this point in the single parenting game: We have to see it to believe it.

    • 2 mamacrazy0786

      Perfectly said. He’s actually made plans to get her another night this week, and said he wants her one night this weekend when he’s got his other two girls but he’s not sure about this weekend.

      I’m trying not to be too skeptical, but it’s hard. Know what I mean?

  2. Good luck on all of this. I’m sitting here hoping for some reason my son’s Donor would give a crap for two weeks. Longer would be ideal, but like you I feel like I know better! He’s flip flopped so many times before. Le sigh!

    • 4 mamacrazy0786

      Don’t worry about it too much. Just let things be. That’s what I finally did.


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